Remember that time we said when we posted the proposal story blog we could finally write again?
Obviously....That was fake.
It must be some sort of annual thing for January- March to be the craziest time in our lives, because I recall writing a teary-eyed blog about our busy lives a year ago and history seemed to repeat itself this year. In other news- even with only one semester left of school and Ethan with two, Ethan and I have both had plenty of days when we question our career choices. Ethan hasn't felt a lot of encouragement from the Midwest in music therapy as a full time career and I have days when I feel that I only chose teaching as a default because I don't know how to do anything else. Trust me, when you get this close to graduation, even with these doubts you start to feel like you'll settle just to get through and you can change your mind later.
Last month, Ethan started a clinical at Kosair hospital working with music therapy in the NICU. A few months ago he was in Georgia getting certified to work with these tiny babies and he'd had quite a while to be uneasy about the kinds of things he'd be dealing with. In my elementary teacher mind, I was just excited he'd be with babies. I couldn't wait to talk to him after his first session to see how it went.
He was overflowing with excitement about the opportunities to learn more and to just take in the awesome miracle that these babies are. Going into it, the music therapy students were unsure about how the hospital staff would react to their work. To their surprise, they received the utmost respect from the NICU staff and are welcomed when they return each week. I'm so proud when the rest of the world realizes that music therapy is real and can truly help people. I'm even more excited that Ethan can find confidence in what he loves to do. It inspires him to think about how far he can go as a Music Therapist and that means how far we can go since we're in this for the long haul. (and those future plans are a whole other blogpost altogether) Really excited for Ethan's future career!
As for my future career, I know it's teaching. Surprise! But really, if you know an elementary teacher very well you will know that they are constantly doubting themselves and hoping that the kids will get something out of what they're trying to teach. They're praying the test scores will be good, not only so that the nightmare of merit-based pay grants them a paycheck, but so that the students can go on with their lives being children and not worrying about standardized tests and marks that are heavy and dark.
After a recent job, I've decided, I want to be a teacher to have a chance to see the sunshine of a nice day when the kids go out to recess. I want to be a teacher so that I can see my family on the weekends, even if it's from behind a pile of papers to grade. I want to be a teacher to hear the silly ways kids explain life. And finally I want to be a teacher so that I can be who God has obviously created me to be. I've heard it said that no matter where you are, you're going to be doing what God made you to do. Kind of like, even in a retail setting, you're going to be prone to explain things to people in a way they'd understand, refer to a book for answers when you're unsure, and sometimes you're fixing problems people come in with, not what you're assigned to do- that is, if you're called to be a teacher.
"Therefore do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised." Hebrews 10:35-36
